The “tchotchkes on the wall” school of restaurant decoration

Dear restaurant decorating professionals,
Do you have a garage full of useless junk? Well have I got a an idea for you! The next time you decorate a restaurant, in fact every time you decorate a restaurant, here’s what you do: take the useless junk, clean it up a bit, and jauntily array it on the walls of the restaurant. Presto! Instant, stylish decor results at bargain basement prices! No need to bother with expensive luxuries like “artwork” or frou-frou decorator technique. The mere act of affixing junk on the wall instantly elevates it to high-end decorator status. Got an old, rusty shovel? Just nail it to the wall. How clever you are for so ingeniously taking an ordinary object and putting it in an out-of-the-ordinary context! Got a collection of old license plates? In what a person without the truly creative vision you possess might perceive to be a pile of trash you see cocktail menu covers or even wall bordering concept. Go wild! Leave no square inch un-tchotchked. Keep the diners so entertained with wall ornamentation they’ll keep coming back for more. Don’t listen to the client’s concerns that customers won’t take their restaurant seriously. Just remind them that the “tchotchkes on the wall” school of restaurant decoration has taken over the world!